"Dealing with life’s changes."
October 16, 2009 by Mike Strawbridge
Sometimes you just want to change. Other times, change seems to be forced up you. In either event, change can be a very stressful time in your life.
When dealing with a change that has been forced upon you, you can make two choices: you can decide to be a victim of circumstance, or you can decide to take control of your life and make the best of the situation. The remainder of this article is for those who decide to choose the latter.
When a change is forced upon you, you can choose to make the best of the new circumstances that you are faced with. Note that this is a conscious choice. Take time to learn any lessons that you need to from the events that lead to the forced change, but beyond that, let go of the past and focus on the future you wish to create.
Take time to access your goals and dreams. Be sure to write them down. I don’t understand the mechanism behind writing them down, but there seems to be some magic in committing your goals and dreams to paper. Maybe it is the demonstration of faith required to actually write them that tells the universe that you actually believe what you are saying.
By deciding what is really important in your life, you will know where to focus your energy. Do you need to learn new skills to deal with your new situation? Do you need to collect additional resources? Take time to carefully inventory what you have and compare it with what you need to take your life in the direction you want to go.
Often, this assessment is difficult for those who have little experience with dealing with change or setting goals. If you feel you need help, I suggest finding a life coach or a mentor to help you through the process.
My own experience in dealing with a forced change in employment when the corporation I worked for decided to close the plant where I worked has taught me a lot in how to deal with changes. I have chosen to help others deal with changes by applying what I have learned through my own situation. I suggest that you seek out a coach or mentor that has some experience with the kinds of change you are dealing with. However, the principles of dealing with change are universal, so any competent coach or mentor can be of assistance.
Once you have a clear picture of what you want to accomplish and what it will take to get there, you have to take the most important step in the process – get started. This is where most people fail. They fail to start. It is all too easy to fall back into victim mode at this point. Don’t let that happen to you. Choose each day to move forward toward your goals and creating your new life the way you want it to be.
Even if you can’t make a big step toward your goal, just make a step. For example, if you decide you need more training, then look for classes that you can attend or read a book on the subject. If there are other resources that you need, start looking for places that these resources are available. Make a wish list.
Keep a journal of your progress and direction. Begin each day by rewriting your main goals. This will keep your focus. Use your journal to not only chart your progress but to inspire you as well.
Try asking questions to yourself. If you are stuck at some point, just write the question ad them wait for an answer. Write what ever comes to mind. You will often be surprised at the insight that will come to you using this process.
If you are unsure of a goal, just give it a try for a while. If it does not feel right to you after 30 days or so then drop it and move on to another goal. The great thing about life is that you can begin again at any point.
Embrace the changes in your life. Even the ones that seem forced upon you. Make the choice to live life to the fullest extent no matter what your current circumstances. There is an abundance of resources waiting at your disposal – all you have to do is choose
Mike Strawbridge October 16, 2009
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